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Foreigners comes to China to discover his potential realizes he doesn't have any
译者:unknown     发布时间:2019-01-06     超过 0 位网友阅读



SHANGHAI (China Daily Show) – A foreign traveler who arrived in Shanghai two years ago hoping to tap his latent potential spoke yesterday of the brutal realization that he was in fact almost entirely without talent.



“As it happens just going to a country which is in the limelight doesn’t make you special” William “Bill” Hudson told China Daily Show. “Turns out I’m actually kind of a waste of space.”


【Higgs’s attempts at photography (here at the Forbidden City) displayed the total lack of talent that is his forte】

【Higg 在摄影上的尝试(图为故宫),显示了他的特长就是完全没才能】

Hudson reluctantly concluded that he possessed absolutely no potential whatsoever at approximately 8:30 on Saturday morning after a set of shelves erected only minutes before collapsed – smashing an entire collection of jade Zodiac symbols Hudson had spent months sourcing from various antique markets in Yunnan Province.

哈德森在周六早上大约8:30的时候 终于不情愿地做出结论,他该死的是个完全没潜能的人。在这之前他才刚装好没几分钟就垮掉的货架,让其花费了好几个月从云南几家不同古玩市场辛苦淘来的十二生肖玉石全套收藏品摔个粉碎。

As Hudson discussed his pain at coming to terms with mediocrity friends said the realization was only a matter of time after a string of failed endeavors.


“Bill first moved to Guangxi Province to work as an ESL teacher and while the profession does play host to some very interesting and professional foreigners Bill was not one of them” Yangshuo English Corner legend Michael Watson recalled with a sympathetic smile.

"比尔最开始是到广西当非母语英语课程(ESL)教师,但这个行业更加倾向于招那些有趣且专业的外国人,比尔并不是其中之一。”阳朔英语角传奇麦克·沃森(Michael Watson)含着同情的笑容回忆道。

“He didn’t know what he was doing and just sort of read from textbooks aloud” Watson said adding “Didn’t really matter though; the parents loved his pale febrile skin.”


Meanwhile Hudson said he spent many days dreamily cycling and hiking through Guangxi’s beautiful landscape of karst trails and tranquil waters.


Despite bringing a notebook and paint set on his travels however Hudson’s muse yielded nothing more interesting than a series of insipid watercolors along with banal written observations on Chinese society that even Hudson admits to being “sophomoric at best.”


The latter screeds published in a now-discontinued WordPress blog caught the attention of Beijing Normal University literary expert Kang Ma who shared Hudson’s unqualified musings on politics education and food hygiene with his 2.3 million Weibo followers.


The resulting torrent of acrimony forced Hudson to abandon any further literary ambitions and instead attempt to go into business.


Hudson (pictured left) once believed he could make a real difference before finally coming to terms with life's utter indifference to his hopes and dreams

【Hudson (pictured left) once believed he could make a real difference before finally coming to terms with life’s utter indifference to his hopes and dreams】


Hudson tried his hand at translation services IT work and venture capitalism – yet failed to make a single fen.


Many expats suffer “potential shortage” says Beijing-based life coach Atkins Peiterman.

北京的生活教练阿特金斯·派特尔曼(Atkins Peiterman)表示,很多外籍雇员都遭受着“潜力不足”的痛苦。

Maria Chung originally from Manhattan came to China in 2002 already speaking fluent Chinese but now works as a “freelance marketer and style journalist” in Dalian. Yesterday she declined to give China Daily Show details of any recent commissions or published articles.


In fact Peiterman estimates around 60 to 70 percent of foreigners working in China have absolutely no potential or unrecognized talent whatsoever.


“People like Mr Hudson often can’t seem to figure out that despite their ability to pick themselves up and boldly move to another country like China they are still just as pointless here as they were back home” Peiterman noted. “Bill seems to have just twigged this. That’s good – it won’t aid his job prospects in the slightest but at least he knows that now.”


Hudson and others like him can face an uncertain future in China even after years of solid classroom experience – but experts say most will likely still remain in search of a a breakthrough.


“I’ll probably stick around a few more years” said Hudson. “Maybe a decade. Just to be sure.”


Stanshant 90 指標 3 天前
Serious note: As much as people take the piss having come home and enjoyed seven years of rapid career success and family happiness with my old high school sweetheart I will never regret or look down on the six years I spent in China English Corners and all. I would do it all over again in a heartbeat. I miss something about it every single day. I went back last summer after nearly a decade away partly to try to draw a line and put the past in the past and it only made me realise how much I fucking love the place.


[–]gaoshanUnited States 22 指標 3 天前
I haven’t been back in 4 years and it is getting to me. I miss certain things go back and after a while the balance between things I love and things I hate starts to slowly tip until I feel exhausted and ready to leave. I return to the US and after a year or so I start wanting to go back. The cycle never ends.


[–]senumi 6 指標 3 天前
I wish people other than migrants understood this feeling. The way nowhere quite settles as ‘home’. The more countries I add the less and less I know.


[–]jinniuUnited States 6 指標 3 天前
This makes sense for humans though for most of human history we were nomadic. I've been in China for 10 years and I think I'm ready to move on although not back "home" but to another country. China will always be a special place for me though.sure I'll be back. I've been successful here and that probably has much to do with it.


[–]nikatnightUnited States 3 指標 3 天前
In China the mundane can be exciting... And cheap.
But that exciting is also incredibly frustrating when it takes hours to do simple tasks or your cab driver stops to take a 30 minute shit or the bus gets so full people spill out at every stop.


[–]rickrenny 2 指標 3 天前
I’ve just returned to China after 4 years away. Instantly I’ve remembered the things that tired me of it in the first place despite yearning to come back when I was back in England. That’s the way the human mind works unfortunately!


[–]Stanshant 67 指標 3 天前
Hot dry noodles for the most part.
I'm sure that it's partly a simple longing for my 'irresponsible twenties' but it felt like every time I left my apartment I would meet someone different and no two days were ever the same. I miss the buzz. I was a different person there I felt more myself in many ways I found who I was in true loneliness and isolation from everything I knew back home and I like that guy. I live by the sea now in a beautiful house with a wonderful wife and I mostly love myself job but I still miss getting a stinking 588 bus for half an hour to work an evening shift on the fortieth floor and meet my mates straight after for barbecue beers and the oft-derided gutter oil. The people of Wuhan are known for being coarse and aggressive and quite rural in mentality but I loved their directness and warmth. It did feel somewhat gentrified when I went back but there was plenty of 'my Wuhan' left. It also helped that about a dozen of my old mates flew in from around the world (or just took a taxi!) to make the trip a reunx. The warmth we all felt towards each other and our time together there is something I will never forget. I'm closer to those guys than almost anyone else including my high school friends who I still hang out with. They love me and they know how much I love them. It's just a bittersweet fact that we live on opposite sides of the world.


[–]mjl777 63 指標 4 天前 
The best comment was "I did not know that The Onion had a Chinese edition"




[–]colorless_green_ideaUnited States 32 指標 3 天前 
Yeah I remember thinking im wasting my time in China. Got HSK6 and still felt like “what was the point? my time in China still doesnt amount to anything other than an extended vacation.” So i went back to america to start a real career and breathe clean air again


[–]maybemba131 8 指標 3 天前 
Did HSK6 help with anything US career wise?


[–]colorless_green_ideaUnited States 18 指標 3 天前 
I dont use chinese at all and i work in an international logistics company. I guess maybe they saw my China experience on my resume and that helped me get my foot in the door as a 10$/hr temp. But speaking chinese didnt mean i could walk into a job and get benefits and nice salary. So it was really like starting from 0 when I got back. If anybody has free time in China and doesnt feel like learning chinese use the time to learn other marketable skills like programming or something


[–]kieranmullen 3 指標 3 天前 
$10/hr? Miss a zero?


[–]colorless_green_ideaUnited States 7 指標 3 天前 
Just entering the job market in 2013 with no skills $10/hr temp job was normal... i leveraged what i learned after 3 months on that job to get 30k plus salary. But thats still not much. Finally got certified in my field worked crazy OT and make much more than that now. But my main point is my chinese didnt really help at any step along that path.


[–]WhereTheHotWaterAt 9 指標 3 天前 
“HSK 6”
Geez most expats can live years and years in the guo and not be able to zhongwens beyond hsk 4
But still there are more than 1 billion Chinese speakers so learning this language is practically useless for career


[–]smasbut 5 指標 3 天前 
My buddies with better Chinese than mine say freelance translation is booming because maybe only .00000000000000000000000088% of those Chinese can write coherent and grammatically correct English and most of them don't want to work as translators.


[–]mammalian_magistrate 4 指標 3 天前 
My wife is Chinese and does translation. Her spoken English is native-level fluency but I still do a quick look over of her translation work. The translation doesn't pay much but interpretation is good money. She works over the phone with Cantonese and Mandarin speakers and makes around $30-$40/hour. Translation is about $10-$15/hour (depends on the speed she can work).


[–]smasbut 1 指標 3 天前 
I think tech companies are paying well for translation. My friend just got an offer of 40k/month to translate at one of the BAT companies and he's only been freelancing for about a year. Granted this is second-hand and my buddy could be lying though I trust him.


[–]WhereTheHotWaterAt 2 指標 3 天前 
Totally agree. These days I see learning it as a hobby. Some people see Chinese language as this language of the future because China is growing so fast and get memed into learning it


[–]Rampaging_BunnyUnited States 0 指標 3 天前 
Yep Chinese is a hobby. Has been useless for my job search


[–]cmendoza48 9 指標 3 天前 
Serious/Unpopular Fact: most Americans that can’t find a job in the states with their useless liberal arts degree end up teaching English in China.
If they could find a killer job in the states they’d never go to China. This isn’t a secret many Chinese are well aware of this fact.


[–]takeitchillish 6 指標 3 天前 
But why China then? It is also easy to get English teachings jobs with a degree in other countries like Japan Korea Vietnam Thailand and so forth. Even Arab countries.


[–]cmendoza48 12 指標 3 天前 
The demand for english teachers and great english skills are a LOT higher in china than all the other countries you’ve mentioned. Chinese people will spent thousands to not have an accent when they’re speaking English it’s their desire to be a perfectionist. The amount of Chinese students studying in the UK and the US are extremely higher than Japanese and Koreans.
Therefore there are a lot more job opportunities to teach English there and the pay is higher than in other countries.


[–]AGuesthouseInBangkok 4 指標 3 天前 
China is where I could make the most money just for being white and speaking English.
I'd rather be in Japan Thailand or anywhere but here even Mexico but China is making me rich by singing "Old MacDonald Had a Farm."



[–]TheGentlemanK 5 指標 3 天前 
Yeah it’s the same situation for me. At least it started that way. Could have gone to Spain or Mexico if I wanted.
Of course now China has grown on me like the creeping black layer of smog coating my innards in a warm velvety hug.


[–]JoeridgeChua 5 指標 3 天前 
Sounds like the story is fake and meant for anti-Western propaganda.


[–]Rillanon 1 指標 3 天前 
I find this topic interesting because it echos some of the sentiments that chinese immigrants face in the west.


It's the problem of fitting in and the social and economic opportunities afforded to an outsider.
Is china uncrackable for non chinese? I dont think so but its different and will have different challenges.
So if you arent 100% committed im talking learn the language to native level have wife/husband here move all your family and financials here then dont have expectation that you will get anything.


[–]SmirthChina 4 指標 3 天前 
Learning Chinese has no benefit for foreigners.


[–]Rillanon 1 指標 3 天前 
Its true if you believe that.


[–]ChubbyMuffin479 1 指標 3 天前 
I kind of feel like doing anything more than a gap year/study abroad year in China really DOES decrease your potential back in the home country. Of course if you're one of the like 1%-5% of expats who actually work in your field that's totally different. But like in my case once I get back to the beautiful country I'm going to be sitting in accounting interviews. I highly doubt my year at BLCU or two years of English teaching will impress them lolz


[–]ChubbyMuffin479 1 指標 3 天前 
That said the other commenters have a good point-- when I'm in America I get bored and miss China. When I'm in China I get annoyed and miss America. Thus is life I guess.


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